A Conversation with Harville Hendrix, Marriage Whisperer
Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., knows the sorrow of a broken relationship. In 1975, after a 16-year struggle to make a failing marriage work, Hendrix and his wife decided to split up. On the day the divorce was final, he was scheduled to teach a class on marriage at a university graduate school. As Hendrix responded to audience questions, he realized that everyone wants to know the secrets of successful marriages—including him.
That “Aha!” moment spurred years of research with couples and led to his seminal book, Getting the Love You Want, and the creation of Imago Relationship Therapy with his second wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D. Their partnership of 28 years has produced nine books on intimate relationships and parenting, most recently Receiving Love, and six grown children. Imago Therapy seeks to unearth the hidden agendas that we all bring to our relationships and address them with openness, compassion and fearlessness.
What should you know...
An Interview with Alison Armstrong
For 25 years, relationship expert Alison Armstrong has worked to evolve society by changing the way women relate to men. Her yearning to understand the opposite sex was born from personal challenges, including a failed marriage in her 20s. She began studying men on her own, at the age of 30, beginning with the question, “What if men are responding to women?” What started out as a personal inquiry has become a lifelong pursuit and she’s shared her findings with millions of men and women worldwide.
Armstrong, co-founder and CEO of PAX Programs, addresses gender differences, sexuality and relationships. She has written three books, including The Queen’s Code, and speaks to interpersonal insights through workshops, webinars and teleclasses, including free recordings and articles at UnderstandMen.com.
Smile at each other when you first wake up.
Exaggerate your affection for each other. Make everything bigger than it is and add a dash of silliness. For example: Holler “I love you;” speak of your undying love in terms the universe; or romantically describe each other’s eyes with over-the-top comparisons, such as blue as the deep blue sea, green as a rajah’s emeralds.
Laugh together at the funny things seen and experienced on a daily basis.
Go on a spur-of-the-moment picnic.
Dance together in the living room, in the parking lot, on the street or in the mall.
Read to each other before you go to sleep at night.
Cuddle up together on the couch when you watch TV.
Find some time during the day to enjoy a long passionate, romantic kiss.
Walk together holding hands, and swing those hands.
Share at least one bit of humor each day.
Tell each other the good things about one another.
Make a special time each day to laugh and talk for just the two of you.
Practice hanging out...
A Natural Awakenings Exclusive Interview with Byron Katie
While retailers love that the month of February immediately calls to mind images of heart trinkets, sentimental cards, flowers, boxed chocolates and romantic dinners, millions of lonely or broken hearts would rather see February 14 deleted from the calendar. They prefer that the Grinch stole Valentine’s Day.
Those unhappy with Cupid’s aim find a friend in best-selling self-help author, workshop leader and relationship guru Byron Katie. Since 1986 she’s been asking questions rather than providing answers in a way that’s changed many lives, including her own.
Her approach to healing broken relationships can help even in the midst of crisis. Interviewed throughout the past 20 years by publications such as the Los Angeles Times magazine, Body & Soul, Time Magazine, Inspiration Journal and others, Katie’s simple message of how suffering is created and ended has spread globally to 30 countries. The necessary tools for her...
How do we stay positive during times of turmoil and unrest?
Sometimes it can be challenging to keep your vibration high and to stay positive, especially in what seems like great times of change and upheaval, however, staying positive is a key factor in creating the NOW that you choose to experience.
When you can stay calm and in your heart you can help those in need and also benefit the collective consciousness, which we are all a part of. When you silence your mind and connect with the present moment you connect...
Set Out a Welcome Mat for a Soulmate.
Just as we need to create space in our daily schedule to nurture a new relationship, we must create space in our home to welcome in new love. It’s called “feathering the nest”. Think about the first time that our soulmate will walk into our home—what they will they see, smell and feel. Even an inviting, cozy environment may need an upgrade.
The underlying vibration or feeling of a place reflects the home’s energy. Whatever has happened there since its beginning, including arguments, illnesses or times of loneliness, have all left an unseen layer of negative energy. You could say that the walls “talk”.
To begin preparing our home to welcome a mate, first remove the clutter. Piles of magazines, stacks of unshelved books and excessive furnishings are blocking and keeping in old energy and preventing good, clean new energy from flowing. Be sure to remove all photographs and souvenirs that are reminders of past lovers; throw them away or put them in a box away from your home. These...
“To be fully seen by somebody… and be loved anyhow—this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.”
~ Elizabeth Gilbert
At the conclusion of her bestselling memoir, Eat Pray Love, author Elizabeth Gilbert had fallen in love with Jose Nunes (called Felipe in the book), a Brazilian living in Indonesia. The divorced Gilbert, reluctant to have her heart broken again, had vowed never to remarry… yet ultimately changed her mind when U.S. immigration law presented her with multiple choices: marry so they could live together in this country, stay single and live as ex-pat partners or say goodbye to Nunes.
Gilbert chose a marital partnership that suits the shared life they want: honest and, after years of travel, settled in one place. She says, “For the first time in my life, living in a small town with a lovely husband in an old house with a big garden and several pets, I feel absolutely rooted in a way I have never experienced before and never would have imagined even desiring. But it is what we want—at least for...
Relationship Expert Stephanie Coontz Shares Go-To Guidelines
Stephanie Coontz, professor of history and family studies at The Evergreen State College, in Olympia, Washington, shares her learned perspective in an intriguing oeuvre of books—Marriage, A History: How Love Conquered Marriage; The Way We Never Were; The Way We Really Are; and A Strange Stirring. She’s also co-chair and director of public education at the University of Miami’s research-based nonprofit Council on Contemporary Families. As a speaker, she shares good news on marriage, based on her extensive study and observations.
Is marriage becoming passé?
While marriage as an institution is less powerful than it used to be, people have higher expectations of marriage as a relationship. Precisely because most Americans no longer feel they have to marry, they are more specific about what they want from it. When a marital relationship works today, it is fairer, more intimate, more mutually beneficial and less prone to violence than...
Katherine Woodward Thomas on Drawing True Love Our Way
After years of experiencing love going sour, Katherine Woodward Thomas set a goal: She would marry her soul mate within a year. Her quest inspired a surprising awakening that spurred her to look deep inside for the key that would unblock love. Thomas realized the transformation that enabled her success involved clear steps that could help anyone. Today, the licensed psychotherapist and relationship expert has guided thousands toward successful relationships via her national bestseller, Calling in “The One”: 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life, and subsequent books and seminars.
What catalyzed your Calling in&n bsp;“The One” professional journey?
I was 41, a card-carrying member of one of America’s largest-growing groups—the never-marrieds. I had bought into the cultural belief that a woman my age had little chance of finding a great husband. I felt anxious and resigned, trying to come to terms with it, but sad...
A conversation with Paul and Betty Richards
Healthy energy habits, applied to gender awareness, result in extraordinary relationships, say Paul and Patty Richards, whose 59 “Energetic Facts of Life” emanate from their own experience. They teach these principles through the Senté Center they co-founded in the United States and New Zealand. Both are trained seers who formerly enjoyed dynamic careers in aerospace engineering and nursing. They call for the intelligent harmonizing of masculine and feminine energies in intimate relationships as pivotal to humanity’s survival.
Natural Awakenings explores some of the key principles this lovingly aware pair practices, as articulated in their new book, Wild Attraction.
How do we ensure that we are attracted to and attracting a safe, available partner?
At heart, you must first have a confidently open, positive expectation that qualified candidates exist. It’s a complex process these days to find a healthy,...
Gay Hendricks and his wife, Kathlyn, have discovered through working on their own relationship and counseling hundreds of other couples that the time from midlife onward offers the greatest opportunity of any other period to grow love. At a mutual low point, they made the life-changing decision to rebirth their marriage, tapping into a new source of energy and rejuvenation that’s producing extensive and surprising benefits.
The Ojai, California-based couple, both with Ph.D. degrees, co-authored their first trailblazing bestseller, Conscious Loving, more than 20 years ago and have published 30 other books, including their latest, Conscious Loving Ever After. The Hendricks Institute that they founded annually offers workshops and seminars in North America, Europe and Asia. Their nonprofit Foundation for Conscious Living funds research, films and scholarships related to relationship well-being.
Why do you say the best relationships are possible in the second half of life, including the greatest sex?
Jill Crosby, owner and founder of the Conscious Dating Network, has focused on spiritual development and meditation for more than 30 years. Working as a director for the granddaddy of the original onsite photo/video dating companies, which included interviewing 6,000-plus singles, sparked a desire to create a venue for spiritually conscious singles to meet. So, 18 years ago, she created her flagship online dating site, SpiritualSingles.com. NaturalAwakeningsSingles.com, launched in 2013 as part of the network, shares the same database of members as SpiritualSingles.com and many affiliated conscious and "green" dating sites in the network.
Today, the Conscious Dating Network is the largest of its kind. From Mount Shasta,...
I have truly been moving through many deep levels and layers of healing, following the passing of my mother last March.
People often describe a complete transformation taking place in their lives after the death of someone close. Something about death causes you to reach deeply into your soul – as I said when my sister passed away over 4 years ago, your “heart gets broken open.”
Although my relationship with my mother was very...
The following is a vision that I received in October, 2011. It came to me in the evening before going to sleep while lying in bed. It was if I was actually there, living it. I don't know what created this mass awakening, however, it was very vivid and beautiful. When I came back to this realm I took copious notes in my iphone which was on my night stand. After meditating the morning of 11/11/11, I felt guided to share this vision with our members in the form of a mass email. I got sooooo many responses from that email that I decided to post it on the site. I feel that this vision is waking up deep seeded cellular (and probably DNA) memories for those that read it, feel it and connect with it. I share this with unconditional love and a knowingness that we are all FAMILY. In-JOY!
Here is the vision I was given:
Everyone on the planet...